Share Your Dilemmas Anonymously. Find your way.
Anonymously post your life's tough questions and let the community help you find clarity through votes and thoughtful advice.
Most Commented This Week
Love and Sex
Should I forgive my best friend for ghosting me?
So, my best friend and I have been dating secretly for like a year now. It's been fun, but honestly, I'm not sure if I'm ready to commit. The thing is, I think he might be feeling the same way. He's been acting weird lately, like he's avoiding me. I know we've had fights, but I don't think it's that serious. The problem is, I don't know if I can forgive him for just ghosting me for a week. On one hand, I want to give him a chance. On the other, I'm kinda hurt and confused. I don't want to lose him over this. What do you think? Should I let it go, or should I just be honest about how I feel?
Mental Health
Should I tell my parents I'm not coming home for the holidays?
I live far away from my parents, and I've been meaning to visit them for a while. I'm actually pretty busy right now, but I feel like I should make an effort to see them before the year ends. The thing is, I'm not sure if I want to go. I know they'll be disappointed, but I also don't want to feel like I'm just going through the motions. I've been overthinking this for days, and I'm not sure if I'm overcomplicating it. I don't want to hurt their feelings, but I also don't want to feel like I'm obligated to go. I'm just really confused about how to handle this. Should I tell them I'm not coming, or should I just go and hope for the best?
Teens
Should I keep playing this sport I barely enjoy?
So I joined this local soccer club a few months ago. I was like, 'Hey, I've always wanted to try it,' but now I'm starting to wonder if I'm just going through the motions. I don't hate it, but I also don't love it. The team is okay, the coaches are fine, but I feel like I'm just showing up because I said I would. I've missed a few practices because I had other stuff going on, and I don't know if I should just drop out or if I should just suck it up and keep going. On one hand, I don't want to be that person who quits halfway through. On the other hand, I feel like I'm wasting my time if I'm not even that into it. I've thought about talking to the coach, but I'm not sure if I should just ghost the whole thing. What do you think? Should I keep pretending I'm into it, or should I just cut my losses?
Dilemmas You Might Have Missed
Computers & Technology
How to send messages between users?
We're building a business application that needs communication between users. It's not a chat app, but users need to be able to send messages to each other, and those messages need to be stored and delivered reliably, including when the recipient is offline. I'm curious how other developers handle this. Do you usually: * design and build the messaging infrastructure yourself, including storage, delivery, reconnects, offline messages, etc. * use an existing service such as Firebase, Ably, PubNub, Pusher, or something else? If you use an existing service, which one and why? If you build it yourself, what made you choose that route?
Love and Sex
I masturbated with a 'dildo' and I bled
I'm sorry for anyone who reads this. I am sincerely asking for advice and some stories you can share with your experience before. I would also like to apologize for my language as I might have been to explicit with my use of words. I might have sounded overdramatic. I don't know if it's because I am about to have my period. I have always had restraint on myself when it comes to pleasuring myself, because most of the time. I don't really feel aroused; therefore, the lack of need for me to masturbate to release that. There comes once in a while, or every month just before/after/during period, I feel very aroused and I badly wanted to be fucked. I am sorry for the language. It's like an itch inside waiting to be scratched. For context, I am practicing celibacy, and I don't really feel sexually aroused all the time or most of the time. Just today, I tried for the first time using a 'dildo' to pleasure myself. It took quite a few minutes before I reached orgasm, but it felt ecstatic. I realized that when I kept going, it smelled bloodier and it's not as easily sensitive as it was before climax. I thought maybe I am done for the night. However, when I pulled it out, there's a string of blood mixed with fluids on my 'dildo'. I was thinking it might be my period coming up, but am afraid I might have wounded myself or what they usually say that women who didn't lubricate themselves enough would bleed? I don't know which I am between the two cases. I sincerely hope you guys would be able to share your experience. I'll check myself for the time being.
Just life
I feel lost
I feel lost. I don't know what to do with my life. I work as a constructor and I go to fitness every day. I am amazingly healthy but I still feel miserable. I don't have a girlfriend, I am living with my grandmother.