Share Your Dilemmas Anonymously. Find your way.
Anonymously post your life's tough questions and let the community help you find clarity through votes and thoughtful advice.
Most Commented This Week
Mental Health
Should I lend money to a friend who's struggling?
I'm feeling torn about whether to lend money to a friend who's in a rough patch. She's not exactly broke, but she's been dealing with some unexpected expenses and is asking for a few hundred dollars to cover them. I have the money, but I'm also worried about not seeing it back. She's been good about paying me back in the past, but I don't want to set a precedent if things go wrong. On the other hand, I don't want to be the reason she ends up in a worse situation. That's not exactly what I mean-I don't want to be a bad friend, but I also don't want to get burned. Maybe I should just say no and hope she finds another way? Or maybe I should offer a smaller amount with stricter terms? I'm not sure what the right balance is here.
Computers & Technology
How to send messages between users?
We're building a business application that needs communication between users. It's not a chat app, but users need to be able to send messages to each other, and those messages need to be stored and delivered reliably, including when the recipient is offline. I'm curious how other developers handle this. Do you usually: * design and build the messaging infrastructure yourself, including storage, delivery, reconnects, offline messages, etc. * use an existing service such as Firebase, Ably, PubNub, Pusher, or something else? If you use an existing service, which one and why? If you build it yourself, what made you choose that route?
Health
New phone or wait for the sale?
I just got a new job and my current phone is starting to feel outdated. I like my current one but it's getting slow and I keep dropping it. I was thinking of getting the new iPhone but I'm worried about the cost. I've been looking at the latest model and it's like $1000, which is a lot for me right now. I could wait and see if there's a good sale or if I can find a used one that's still in good condition. What do you think? Should I splurge now or wait it out?
Dilemmas You Might Have Missed
Computers & Technology
How to send messages between users?
We're building a business application that needs communication between users. It's not a chat app, but users need to be able to send messages to each other, and those messages need to be stored and delivered reliably, including when the recipient is offline. I'm curious how other developers handle this. Do you usually: * design and build the messaging infrastructure yourself, including storage, delivery, reconnects, offline messages, etc. * use an existing service such as Firebase, Ably, PubNub, Pusher, or something else? If you use an existing service, which one and why? If you build it yourself, what made you choose that route?
Love and Sex
I masturbated with a 'dildo' and I bled
I'm sorry for anyone who reads this. I am sincerely asking for advice and some stories you can share with your experience before. I would also like to apologize for my language as I might have been to explicit with my use of words. I might have sounded overdramatic. I don't know if it's because I am about to have my period. I have always had restraint on myself when it comes to pleasuring myself, because most of the time. I don't really feel aroused; therefore, the lack of need for me to masturbate to release that. There comes once in a while, or every month just before/after/during period, I feel very aroused and I badly wanted to be fucked. I am sorry for the language. It's like an itch inside waiting to be scratched. For context, I am practicing celibacy, and I don't really feel sexually aroused all the time or most of the time. Just today, I tried for the first time using a 'dildo' to pleasure myself. It took quite a few minutes before I reached orgasm, but it felt ecstatic. I realized that when I kept going, it smelled bloodier and it's not as easily sensitive as it was before climax. I thought maybe I am done for the night. However, when I pulled it out, there's a string of blood mixed with fluids on my 'dildo'. I was thinking it might be my period coming up, but am afraid I might have wounded myself or what they usually say that women who didn't lubricate themselves enough would bleed? I don't know which I am between the two cases. I sincerely hope you guys would be able to share your experience. I'll check myself for the time being.
Just life
I feel lost
I feel lost. I don't know what to do with my life. I work as a constructor and I go to fitness every day. I am amazingly healthy but I still feel miserable. I don't have a girlfriend, I am living with my grandmother.